The importance of showing up

Happy one month into the year! I, and you because, you're reading this, have made it through the first month of the year! Congratulations to us! I mean that because it has been busy.

Recently I have had people ask me how my semester has been going and the honest truth is, "CRAZY."

It's not bad in any way, I am super motivated, most of the time in a happy state and have people that care about and support me. I have just had FULL days. From 7:30 a.m. to 6, sometimes 7 p.m. go-go-go. From classes, to writing for the school paper, my internship, being a CA and decent human...it's a lot. Once I'm home I still have to get homework done, always be on the lookout for stories, host programs, be there for others and try to find time for myself. Once I can process my day, I'm "peopled out" and coming from me that's surprising to some.

When the New Year began I was reading through hundreds of resolutions made by friends and family. Silently scrolling thinking, what are my resolutions? In the past I've made them, not really stuck with them and then let them go. This year I had no desire whatsoever to make any resolutions. I really didn't think I'd find "my thing" for the new year until about three days in, I had to give myself a pep talk.

Today I can't remember exactly what it was about or why. I think for me it didn't feel like a new year, just another day. While everyone was getting into it, I was still stuck. So I said "Erin you still have to show up everyday."

I soon found out that "showing up" was going to look and feel differently everyday. These are also two powerful words if you can make them your reality. Some of my mornings would start with me almost jumping out of bed and being in the best morning mood. Others, I would lay there and not want to get up or go to class and I would say out loud, "Erin, you just have to show up." Emphasis on the show up.

Somehow that got me up, even at a slow pace, but I understand the importance of showing up, being somewhere and doing my best. Not the best, but my best.

If it's getting to the gym after a long day I just tell myself to show up. Waking up for a class after only four hours of sleep, I just have to get my feet on the ground and get ready. If it's getting to my internship with a good attitude, I have to get there and I gain happiness by being around my co-workers. The hardest part of a lot of things is starting, and by showing up, you've taken the first step.

So for me, 2019 is not about specific resolutions and ways to better myself, but by realizing that if I can show up, I can be better each day.