Put yourself in a place to be seen

When you give the girl a ball and open space the possibilities are infinite. She is no longer looking for people to notice her. She believes in herself and talents and creates a force that makes people want to see her.

Last Thursday I went to visit a friend in the Rec center, only planning to drop in and say hi. We caught up for a bit and then I suggested we get a soccer ball and kick it around. She soon had to leave and I decided to stay and just use the space of the court to run some energy off and kick the ball around. This is nothing new for me, especially when winter hits I tend to move my soccer workouts into the gym and stay as long as I need to.

Well, conveniently, two courts over was the Jennie's soccer team. A National Championship team with lots of accomplishments and talents. Out of my left peripheral I could see the coach heading toward my court. I almost didn't know what to do so I kept playing. I figured if he really wanted anything he'd come all the way to my court. AND HE DID.

The conversation went something like this:

Coach: "Hi what's your name and year?"

I responded with Erin and senior (it broke my hear to say out loud).

He said he noticed me playing and that he saw a player in me.

In my head I was thinking, yeah this player was a little better three/four years ago.

He then asked why I'd never tried out for them.

OH MY GOSH. This is when I almost broke down.

I told him I had to accept that I wasn't going pro with it and as a journalism major a lot of time would needed to be dedicated to my schooling (that was BS).

In reality I did try. I tried everything I could. Before coming to UCM I got in contact with him and he said he'd have me out for walk on but never game me a time or place. Then I began showing up to games and sometimes practices just to watch how I needed to play to be at their level and try to talk with him in person. Truly, I think I had what it would've taken but soon realized the communication not working may have been a sign that my soccer career was over.

He asked when I was graduating and I quickly came up with Summer 2019, but probably December. Any chance I may get to even play a game of college soccer I'll take. I still want this opportunity as badly as I did as a freshmen and it's exciting that it's coming back around. It's just not at the most convenient time.

We talked a little about my history playing and I said I'd been playing since kindergarten and began club ball in middle school. I told him I play with the rec team, mainly the guys, and that I try to find time to just come kick around in the gym.

He nodded and asked me to email him and he would see what he could do about me coming out to maybe kick around with the team one day. Let me tell you how cool that felt!

I don't know where this chance could go, but it's one that I learned a BIG lesson from. That is, putting yourself in a place to be seen. Had I picked any other court or gone outside that day, I wouldn't have been where I needed to be to get noticed. In life sometimes I think we discount ourselves for "that job" or any opportunity. Sometimes we just have to know deep down that we're qualified and put ourselves somewhere to be seen by others already doing the work we aspire to be doing.

I will say, had I played college soccer from the start I wouldn't have near the same college experience that I have had, and at the end of the day I wouldn't change it.

The hopeful and optimist in me thinks he'll give me a small chance. The realist is still saying, "Let it go." I'll continue being in a place that people want to see me and the talents that I have. For now we just wait and see.